7 months ago

Move on From Your Failed Relationship Right Now

Dear Love Drive, 

When do you know you're over your ex? It's been months now and I still can't stop thinking about him. I want to move on, I'm tired of feeling this way. 

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Too Sad, 28 W​


Ouch. It sounds like you desperately want to get over your ex, but you're still quite not ready yet. That's a tough place to be.

The good news is that it will pass, and we've all be there. You're not alone.

A few years ago, I dated a woman for 6 months. It was intense from the get go, we burned hard and we burned fast. 

We also burned out quickly and she broke up with me over cheap Indian food. I was devastated. That it was done over cheap Indian food just added insult to injury.

For months I thought we'd get back together. I was completely delusional. I can see it now but I couldn't see it then. I call her my crazy ex, but I was the crazy one. 

That's neither here nor there. The reality is that it took almost a year for me to get over her, and we'd only dated for 6 months. 

But I finally started to get over here, and here were some of the signs:

  • I stopped having anxiety dreams about her
  • I stopped stalking her social media
  • I could picture running into her with her new boyfriend and not being sad about it
  • I started noticing other women and going on dates
  • I stopped comparing other woman to her

It Takes The Time It Takes

There's no secret formula to how long it takes for people it get over breakups. Sometimes it's a few weeks and other times it's a few years. 

While you never know how long it'll take, you can help your chances. Significantly.

Speed up the healing process by doing this:

  • Accept the fact that it's over
  • No contact with your ex for 6 months
  • Spend time with friends and loved ones
  • Take extra good care of #1 (that's you)
  • Stay busy and productive
  • Be sad when you feel like being sad
  • Know that what you're feeling is temporary

Oh right, I also made this video for you this week. It's for everyone who's going through a breakup right now. I hope you like it. 

Did you like this post? If so, do me a favor and add a comment below. Tell us what you do to help you get over a breakup. 

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Shaun Galanos

Shaun Galanos is The Love Drive. He believes we all deserve love and works to help men (and women) develop more intimate relationships through honest and playful communication.

He lives, writes, and makes videos in Montreal.

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